Have you ever noticed that when the Real Housewives of Atlanta ladies go on a trip, it takes two episodes just to get through the drama?
RHoA 7×10, “Puerto Read-Co,” set the scene for a group trip to Puerto Rico and culminated in an explosive dinner during which Phaedra and Demetria sparred (“The only thing we have in common is the number eight: Yours is going, mine’s been here for eight,” Demetria smirked), NeNe called Claudia a whore in no uncertain terms and Claudia proceeded to, as Kandi put it, “read NeNe like Hooked on Phonics.” RHoA 7×11, “Divide & Ki-Ki,” picks up at that dinner, so one thing’s for sure: The drama will be more plentiful than the alcohol.
To the left
RHoA 7×11 interrupts its broadcast of Claudia and NeNe continuing to scream at each other with a brief word from Porsha.
“I don’t know what’s going on,” Porsha reveals in her personal interview (not exactly a shock there). “It just really went to the left.”
After NeNe insults Claudia’s spaghetti straps, Claudia strikes back with “You should have a little less spaghetti in your diet.”
In case any viewers had any doubt, Cynthia clarifies the situation in her personal interview: “What you’re witnessing right now is NeNe Leakes getting read.”
Claudia, Kenya, Demetria and Cynthia decamp to the pool area for a post-mortem of the situation while NeNe, Phaedra, Porsha and Kandi remain at the table. Remember the Africa trip from a couple of season ago when then-besties NeNe and Cynthia formed the “Talls” clique with Marlo Hampton while Kandi, Phaedra and former RHoAn Sheree Whitfield banded together to become the “Smalls”? It’s happening again in RHoA 7×11.
The morning after
The morning after the blowout, NeNe admits to Phaedra and Porsha that she feels bad about what happened and may have “lit the match that started the fire.” Meanwhile, Phaedra’s still confused about why Demetria even thinks she threw shade in 1×10 in the first place, and as for Claudia? She’s drinking a pina colada by the pool before some of the ladies are even awake.
Because Kandi’s previous sex-and-relationships party in 7×09 ended in awkwardness when her friend Gocha claimed to have dated the man Demetria’s been with for eight years – while Demetria was with him – she decides to try again in Puerto Rico. While Phaedra prepares for the do-over, Demetria drops by her room to clear the air.
Last night was not about embarrassment, it was not about trying to be mean, it was just about really understanding each other’s boundaries, and I know I crossed a boundary last night. I apologize for how I did it.
Phaedra counters that Demetria’s reference to Apollo’s impending incarceration was inappropriate but ultimately agrees to bury the hatchet. The two seal the deal with a hug.
The Bedroom Kandi revamp gets a Puerto Rican twist with a private beach setup, and soon the ladies are happily passing a sex toy between themselves à la Hot Potato.
“I have many skills, but apparently catching a dildo between my legs isn’t one of them,” declares Phaedra in her personal interview. Perhaps that’s for the best.
In an effort to keep the good vibes from the evening beach party going throughout the next day, the ladies relax in their two separate groups: Phaedra, Kandi, NeNe and Porsha on the beach, and Kenya, Claudia and Cynthia by the pool. (Demetria, presumably, is preparing for the performance that’s the reason they’re all in Puerto Rico in the first place.)
That evening, everyone minus Demetria piles into the minivan to go see Demetria sing, and NeNe takes the opportunity to invite them all to see her on Broadway. Claudia offers her congratulations but asks for acknowledgment of her own accomplishments, namely being on a nationally syndicated radio show. The conversation quickly devolves into a shouting match over the whore accusation from the night before, but NeNe ultimately apologizes (well, kind of). Are the fireworks over? Not a chance. Before you know it, Claudia’s accusing Porsha of being a whore and claiming the man who’s been buying the other woman expensive bags, cars and shoes is married. Kenya gets involved (of course) and Porsha threatens a slander-based law suit. When Claudia throws in her two cents, Porsha calls her “a contradictory.”
“Baby girl,” Claudia addresses Porsha in her personal interview, “You tried to use a big word that was over two syllables and that’s not how you use it, boo.”
As for Demetria’s performance, the girls miss two-thirds of it but show up in full force for the last song, typical Real Housewives of Atlanta style.
Quote of the Week: “I love a bag, I love a car, I love a shoe, but damn it, I’m not gonna put miles on my vagina to get it.” – Claudia Jordan
Tune into Bravo next Sunday night at 8/7c for more drama from The A.